Flirting

Yes, flirting is a womanly essence. OK, I admit we don’t solely own this one. It belongs to both genders.

Flirting can be so much fun!  It is playful, provocative, teasing, and yes, nurturing. People read it as, “I noticed you.” “You have my attention.” “I like you.” “I am attracted to you.” “I want you to like me.” Carried further, it will communicate intense sensual feelings without having to say anything direct.

A new couple can effortless be creative and find ways to communicate across the room with flirting gestures. The eyes alone can say so much. Adding little sneaky touches and gestures can build excitement and anticipation. We should not lose our creativity just because we have spent 25 years together, and we haven’t.

We still find opportunities to send coy messages to each other. Without realizing it we have developed our own  love language. Some of it is words, and some of it is body language. 

For instance, my DH knows what is on my mind, if while he is pumping gas, I go into the convince store and come out sucking a tootsie pop. He will look up, see me with it, chuckle and smile.  I set the stage for this a while back when I teased him at an impossible time, and he had to refuse my advances.  I went into the store and bought a chocolate tootsie Pop, (because chocolate has its own message,) and came out and sat beside him and sensually ate the sucker. I make it a point not to wear this one out. Every time I have done this, I get his sexy chuckle and a smile, which do me a world of good.

For twenty-five years, he has run his finger down the center of my back. If someone sees this, they would think he is trying to give me the chills. But… we know he is really doing a bra check. He is checking to see if he feels a strap. It is not so much the bra check itself, as it is letting me know what is on his mind. I know he wants me, and that makes me feel good.

He is allergic to perfume, but I have found one that is more of a scented oil and does not bother him. It does not last long, but I try to make it a point to put it on when it counts. There is a definite association between that scent and our lovemaking. This makes it possible to flirt just by wearing that scent. It says, “Watch out boy, her she comes.. she’s a man eater.” 

Of course flirting does not have to pertain to sexual advances. Sometimes he just comes up behind me, lifts my hair and softly kisses the back of my neck. He strokes my hair back down and walks away. The moment is so tender. If I can, I stop what I am doing, and run after him to get a hug.

We still hold hands, and we still play footsie under the table. He will take our folded hands up to his mouth and kiss my hand. I will do the same thing, except instead of kissing his hand I will give him a quick suck on his fingertip. We still make googley eyes across the room and cast sly smiles. We blow sneaky kisses or lick our lips.

He has from day one, never let our children sit or walk between us. He always says, “That is mommy’s place.” The children have turned it into a game. They will purposely take my place next to him if I get up. Then when I get back, they smile and pretend to resist. We call them “horners” when they do this for trying to “horn in.” It is always an occasion to laugh. It may seem like just a game, but this one ritual has seated his love deep in my heart. It makes me want to kiss him, and I usually do it. Then the kids do their obligated “Ewe..,” and we laugh and smile. Our eyes meet and silently say, “I love you.”

All of this flirting has only intensified over the last three months. Our ANR has brought its own flirting gestures and language. Afterwards, I giggle and he chuckles. We smile. Then my milk lets down. lol