I am hoping to start some discussion on the different types of affection that can be expressed in bosoming, by both people.
There are many assumptions that could be made, and they shouldn’t be. A common assumption by those outside of ANR is that the one suckling is expressing a submissive affection. They are just as likely to assume that the women is expressing a dominant motherly or matronly affection. For some this is true. Some men even call her momma. Those are wonderful forms of affection, but they should not be assumed.
Couples are using ANR to express various heartfelt feelings and mind sets. In some, the one who is offering the breast does so with an affection of honor mixed with their feeling of love. This is reminiscent of the tales in which warriors were given the milk from the breasts of grateful women, to give the warrior strength for battle. It also brings to mind the ancient painting of the aging Emperor being offered a breast of his subject. Whether this is the simple honor shown by a wife towards her husband or deep felt admiration and reverence, it is far from a dominant motherly affection. It is still nurturing, but the heartfelt reason for wanting to lovingly nurture her man is more than romantic affection or passion, it is also respectful honor and her voluntary subjection in this area. It is far from the motherly love and responsibility to provide nourishment.
I have read personal stories where it is the woman being honored in her role as a “goddess,” and she is the more dominant person in the relationship. Yet she is still not mothering her man and is nor viewing him as a childish. He offers his lips to show adoration, not dependence.
I could see a possibility where the bases of affection don’t necessarily correlate with each other. Perhaps both feel the admiration and the desire to please. Neither one of them is seeing themselves as receiving, but both giving. Of course it could be completely opposite where both see themselves on the receiving end of adoration.
For some it is clearly a gift of loving affection and each of them are on both the giving and receiving ends. There is a mutual respect and honor between two mature adults who love each other and want to share an intensely intimate act of affection. Both are being emotionally nurtured by the other in this act of intimacy.
There was a time in our relationship years ago, when my husband and I had just dealt with some serious relationship issues. Sex was emotionally uncomfortable for me, because of where the rest of our relationship was. I felt a need to spend intimate time together that was non-sexual, and slowly work our way back into our sexual relationship. One of the little rituals that came about was my desire to towel dry him after his morning shower. It sounds silly, but it was what it was. I wanted to caress him in a non sensual way to show him I still loved him, and I had a desire to give myself to him, but in a lesser intimate way. At first, he just tolerated it. After about a week, I could tell he was growing impatient with the whole thing. I asked him why it bothered him. He said, “Because I am a grown man, and I can dry myself off. I don’t like being treated like a kid.” Whoa! I had seriously miscommunicated my affection and needs. Then I explained to him, my desire was to serve him, not mother him. I asked him to look at it in the way that oriental women traditionally serve their men. It was a way to show an affectionate honor and admiration, not motherly affection. Once he knew my real intention, it was well received.
Communication is important, no matter what your reason is for desiring or participating in ANR. The feelings present are bound to be more than just the physical sensations of nipples and lips. The act is too intimate to be only physical. What emotions and affections are being shared? How does it make you feel? What do you want the other person to feel? Perhaps it changes over time, or changes from one session to the next. Maybe at first it is enough just to do it. Eventually though, I think you will grow trusting enough to make yourself even more vulnerable and really communicate your heartfelt affection and what it is you are experiencing.
Do you know your own bases of affection? Do you know what way your spouse is feeling? How does this express your relationship? Perhaps I am leaving you with something to ponder. I would love to hear your thoughts in this area.
His Milkmaid
Yesterday was a busy day for my man. He made it home for lunch and dinner, but bosoming was crowded off the priority list by the need to return quickly to work. 